“Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” Romans 12: 21

Relationships are one of the hardest things to navigate. It’s because of our sinful nature. It’s our nature to want to do good to those who do good to us. It’s easy to serve and hang out with the people you like, who you click with, and who also appreciate you. But it is so hard to serve, forgive, love those who don’t. 

The Lord has been revealing to me how deeply I operate in my sinful nature. He has revealed to me my tendency to judge those I envy, to curse those who hurt and despise me, and to ignore those who do not appreciate me. These past few weeks, I felt I have been stretched to my limit in serving. It seemed there was no end to my cleaning, cooking, teaching, accompanying, but also forgiving, bearing, loving, humbing myself. Serving takes a lot of effort and sacrifice and it’s very easy to burn out if I’m doing it just out of duty or righteousness. I’m tired, but I’m noticing a difference – as I reach that breaking point, the still small voice in me reminds me of that nothing I do matters unless I do it in Jesus’ name, that actually this “loving” and “serving” I do is not at all me but Christ’s power in me. He brings me to think about my Lord who served me even when I hated him, who forgave me even when I rejected him, and who loved me even when there was nothing lovable in me. In other words, his love is without reason, without calculation, without self, and without condition. It is endless. If this is the love I have received, and if this Christ lives in me, it is a lie that I should stop loving or serving as soon as it is uncomfortable, or painful, or humiliating. In Christ, I have overcome all of that. Because I am rich in his endless and abounding mercy, I can indeed “pour out myself as drink offering” to those I feel don’t deserve it.

It’s a real painful process to die to my reason and righteousness, to pay back evil with evil. But Satan only destroys the whole church body and oneself with that. The only solution is Christ. The good that Christ showed us is dying for us, because he loved us. He did it so that we might not die as we deserve but that we may live through the victory of his resurrection over evil.

Let us not succumb to our jealousy, our grudging, our judgment, our vengeance but submit to the way of the Lord who poured himself out as a living sacrifice. Let us not be stingy with our love because we have be made rich in his mercy through the cross. Let us surrender ourselves to our Father who is willing to mold us into vessels that contain the endless fountain of his love, truth, grace, and power. To die is true victory. To die is true life.